so, yesterday was my birthday. yay! (?) i’m kind of past the point of being really excited — or depressed — about it. birthdays right now are another day, another milestone to look at what i’ve accomplished in the past year and a new start to decide what i want for the coming one. Spy and i had a sitter and had a super casual dinner (hello, apps and wine!) at Wrecking Bar before catching The Santaland Diaries, which is an adaptation of David Sedaris’ Holidays On Ice, which i loved reading. totally low-key and totally cool for a Wednesday non-milestone birthday. there were cards and a couple silly gifts Miss Girl was more than happy to unwrap for me. it was pretty perfect, as 44th birthdays go.
but night before last, my birthday present to me arrived. a couple weeks ago, when Kate Spade was doing Black Friday/Cyber Monday shenanigans, i was completely indecisive and <facepalm>missed the $175 deal on the $498 bag i really wanted</facepalm>. as a consolation, though, i somehow came across this absolutely charming little keychain (the back is engraved with SHE CRAVES ADVENTURE). it is probably the least expensive thing on katespade.com, even before any discounts. but it sang to me. i so love being a Sagittarian. i so crave adventure. and for many years i have been kind of obsessed with having a perfect keychain (i can’t explain). the stars aligned, as it were, and i knew this would be my special treat for myself for my birthday this year.
as i adored and Instagrammed it, i started thinking about why it was so precious. well . . . i pretty much always buy myself a birthday present. it could be small. it could be big. (it’s usually small.) a lot of times, it is something i’ve had my eye on but haven’t been able to justify the cost of. it’s usually something like a frivolous pair of shoes. the point is for it to be something only i would buy me that makes me giggle a little every time i see it for at least a few months. it’s something that’s just about me.
i think every girl should always buy herself a birthday gift (big or small) and have a moment of self-celebration on her birthday. and here’s why i think it’s so important:
1. you should celebrate how amazing you are.
every day. duh. but if you can’t celebrate how special you are on the day you were born, when the hell else can you do it? you are like nobody else on this planet. you have smarts and style and laughs and love . . . and so much more to offer. value yourself and treat you as well as you treat others. go out of your way to do something special just for you like you always do for everyone else!
2. you should be proud of your success.
when you can buy yourself a present — without worring about making rent or paying your cell phone bill, that is a mark of success. whether that means you’re at a Louboutin self-gifting level or an extra shot at Starbucks is a real splurge, make the time to have a minute with yourself and celebrate spending your own hard-earned money to buy something just for you to enjoy. nobody else is paying for it, which means nobody else can say a damn thing about whatever it is.
3. you should enjoy your independence.
feeding off of #2, buying yourself what you want on your own terms — without relying on your parents, your friends or your (wo)man — means you have power and can make decisions. the confidence you get from not having to wait for someone else to get you that thing or answer to anyone else about getting it yourself will make you realize you can do so much more in so many other areas of your life — without anyone else’s permission.
4. you should get what you really want.
no matter how many hints you throw, nobody is a mind reader. your best friend, your bae . . . only you are truly inside your head. so don’t be mad about people not getting you the exact right gift. did i want a Darth Vader Christmas tree ornament yesterday? not that much. that was just some 5 year old’s idea of what i wanted. you know what you want. go get it. then reread reasons 2 & 3 if you need a refresher on all the other benefits.
someone please tell me what wonderful birthday gifts you’ve gotten yourself!